Why You Should Embrace What You Can’t Control

How-to Learn from Our Struggles and Succeed.

Isaac Newton once said: “We build too many walls and not enough bridges.”

Most of the time we get caught up in our failures, forgetting the importance of creating space where we can learn from them. In learning from our mistakes, we build bridges toward reaching our goals.

As professionals, it’s inevitable to feel anxious about the outcomes of our efforts in business, especially during these uncertain times when external forces are outside our control. But, are we acknowledging the fact that we have to give ourselves time to feel and reflect in order to succeed?

If we don’t take the time to process and reflect on our failures, we run the risk of increasing our anxiety. This can result in a negative outcome that could create a feeling of lack of control over our career.

Source: Andrea Pacquadio

As an international leadership and negotiation strategist, I have seen how my coaching clients succeed firsthand when they embrace failures and take the time to process their learnings.

Not only have they flourished professionally, but time and time time again they’ve also led their teams to successful outcomes while building the necessary bridges toward new opportunities.

Seeing my clients flourish is the most rewarding part of my career. However, not everything is a bed of roses. Behind every success, you’ll find multiple failures and educational moments when you peel back the curtain.

That saying “When the going gets tough, the tough gets going” has been the motto I have used for years to guide my clients toward their desired outcomes.

Never in my wildest dreams did I think this saying would become front and center for all of us in 2020. Due to external forces (Remember: Outside our control), the going has gotten tougher for everybody. And this toughness may be needed a bit longer as we navigate the distribution of vaccinations on a global scale in the coming months.

In times of trouble, some of us might gravitate toward building walls and using excuses to explain away failures, rather than embracing a path to build new bridges. This tendency is normal. To overcome this unhealthy and unhelpful mindset, I recommend taking time to breathe, give yourself time to pause in the chaos, and embrace how everything is impacting you and your family (good or bad).

It is not surprising that business owners, professionals, and workers around the globe are having trouble maintaining their businesses and lifestyles right now.

It is so important for all of us to realize that our struggles make us stronger and more knowledgeable. Therefore, no matter what is happening around us with the pandemic, the vaccine, or other market downturns; it’s time to focus on our future.

Leave the excuses behind and surround yourselves with the people in your life that will challenge and collaborate with you toward a better future for us all.

Source: Fauxels 

We’ve all heard about the power of our minds and the many ways to use it to our advantage and overcome adversity. This means that if there’s one thing we can control it’s the way we look at our current circumstances and take action to change our perspective. For instance, now that everything is being held virtually, think about the:

  • Time you save from not having to commute,
  • Extra moments you are able to spend with your loved ones,
  • And unique opportunities you’ve had to invest in yourself.

For instance, here are a few simple ways to invest in yourself in just a few minutes every day with this extra time we have while staying home as much as possible:

  • Try a new hobby, like baking or knitting
  • Learn a new language
  • Write your thoughts in a journal
  • Read a book or research a topic

For those of us, whose careers have been affected due to furlough or layoffs, I encourage you to think about what you can do during this extra time to build the necessary bridges to reach your long-term career goals and get back on your feet.

Instead of looking at your situation in the negative, change your mindset to view this moment in time as an opportunity to reinvent yourself, recharge, or simply reclaim this time to invest in your future.

Embracing adversity begins with accepting what we can’t control and learning how to manage it in a way that gets us closer to achieving our goals.

Learning to use what we have available is also an essential part of growing and becoming our best self. I hope you’ve learned a bit about how you can still achieve your goals in turbulent times, and I truly hope you and your loved ones are safe, happy, and healthy.

Learn more business and negotiation tips and join our Negotiation Unleashed Family on YouTube (Speaker Elizabeth Suárez).

Elizabeth Suárez
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3 thoughts on “Why You Should Embrace What You Can’t Control”

  1. Hi Elizabeth, I believe these adversities make us stronger. We just have to dig out of them and find things like you recommended to get us out of them. Too many people want to control everything and we really can’t. We can only control ourselves and no one else 🙂 We may influence others but not control them.

    • Great points, Lisa. We can only control too much. If we try to control everything, we can end up spinning out of control! We need to learn to embrace what we can’t control and learn to work within it and benefit from it.


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